Wednesday 29 January 2014

You know what I never wake up loving? Patriarchy.

You know what I never wake up loving? Patriarchy.

Most of the feminist rants I have start off with some brain food. In this case, it was this image.


It's certainly worth thinking about. In my experience, it is true that male feminists are regarded as "better" than female feminists. But why?

I had a few ideas, although I'm pretty sure I barely scratched the surface. Is it because there are fewer male feminists than female, making them a rarity, in the same way that platinum is more valuable than iron, because of the quantities that exist? Is it as the picture implies, that male people are considered more valuable as a rule, so male feminists are regarded higher than female feminists by default? The idea I think might be the most interesting is that because feminism supports equal rights for women, a man supporting it is considered more selfless and thus nicer, because they do not appear to be benefiting from supporting feminist movements.

Likely, it is all three, with many others included. But after some very careful consideration, I decided that whilst the last reason - the idea that men being feminists is selfless - isn't really true.

Whilst the world "patriarchy" implies that we live in a male dominated society, and this is certainly the case, it is certainly not the whole story. We do not live in a society with two clear cut tiers - the female and male tiers. The group of people who benefit from this widespread oppression are actually a lot more niche.

How many gay men do you see in power? These are another group who get quashed down in the same archaic rules that suppress and oppress women. As a general rule these are not the people who benefit from the patriarchy. It is not so much a patriarchy, but a hetero-patriarchy, that glorifies straight men.

In fact, add with that any kind of effeminate man. As long as womanly and feminine are seen as negative things, that will be a bad thing for men with these qualities. If a man is victim to any sort of crime that people associate with occurring to women such as sexual assault, rape or domestic violence, they will be taken less seriously both by courts and by the general public.

The patriarchy helps to promote a gender binary that categorizes displays of emotion as particularly feminine. This can result in men being socially conditioned to have a lack of emotional literacy. If a man does show emotion, they are often read as "unmanly" and as this is an insult, this can lead to communication issues. On top of this, studies have shown that most decision-making is rooted in emotion; but the ability to express the decision-making process often presents a challenge to men who lack this emotional literacy due to the norms imposed by the current gender binary.

A father in court is far less likely to get full custody of a child after a divorce, as the patriarchy gives people the idea that women are mothers, have closer bonds with their children and are more capable as carers. Stay at home dads bear a stigma unlike that of a stay at home mother.

It is the patriarchy that says that men are stupid, and monolithic and unchanging and incapable. It is the patriarchy that says that men are animalistic instincts, and that they just cannot themselves from sexually harassing and assaulting. It's the patriarchy that says that men can only be attracted to certain qualities, can only have particular kinds of responses, can only experience the world in certain, predetermined, narrow-minded ways.

Are non-cis men, transgender people, intersex people benefiting from the patriarchy? No, no and nope.

So, who does this leave, benefiting from the patriarchy? A group of white caucasian, straight, stereo-typically masculine men, who had good - probably private - educations, who are between the ages of 25 and 40 and who came from rich, upper-middle class families. They excelled at maths and economics and politics and they're probably your boss's boss's boss. In other words, not men, but the man.

From the research I've done, and you can probably tell from this horribly rushed post, which used some appalling generalizations, the overwhelming message is that men do not benefit from the patriarchy. It is in their interests to abolish it.

So why are male feminists considered more valuable than female feminists? It couldn't be because in this horribly layered patriarchy, they're on the next tier up, could it?

Bella x



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